I hired a branding coach! I have come to realize that there is so much more to building a business online that just creating posts and asking people to join my FB lives, courses, and hire me for my healing services or just follow my pages.
I had no idea what I was doing. I just knew that I had some skills and healing techniques I wanted to share with others. These tools and skills have helped me create healing for myself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
Now I have learned that you need to get to know me, on a personal level. I need to be vulnerable and let you into my life. I guess I thought that my personal life was so boring I would just end up boring the rest of you if I posted about it on social media.
I love to read. I have traveled and moved with books for a long time. My books are my security blanket. I get lost in the pages of murder mysteries, spy thrillers, science fiction. A few biographies but not my favorite read. A few romance novels but again not my favorite.
I read the Harry Potter series at least six times. Every time I re-read them I find something new in the pages that I missed the first five times I read them. I re-read most of my books.
I started collecting books when I started my self-help and spiritual journey. I discovered that there are amazing books out there that can help you on every level of your life path. I dove into the pure joy of reading, creating the desire to change my life, the desire to find spiritual awakening. All of it magically held in the pages of books.
I would lend out a book and not get it back and it was like losing something precious and of great value to me. I still do not understand how someone can borrow a book and not return it! Do they not respect the magic that is held within its pages?
I love camping! Being out in nature is my most favorite place in the world. I would happily live in a cabin in the woods beside and lake and never miss the outside world. I am comfortable with my inner being. I have amazing conversations with my Soul and spirit guides. I can have conversations with the Deva's of nature and share the energy of oneness!
I know who I am when I am alone. I know what I like and do not like. I do not have to compromise. Is this a good thing? Not so sure. It makes it hard to be around negative people. It plays havoc on my communication skills. It limits my ability to step out of my comfort zone and go on adventures.
When I was in my teens, and 20's I traveled a lot. I stepped out of my comfort zone all the time. I would jump without looking all the time. Life was just one big adventure after another.
I worked on a carnival that traveled around parts of Canada and the United States for two summers. I met some really interesting people. It was exciting and just plain fun to live in the moment and not think about tomorrow.
I learned to listen to my intuition and trust my instincts during those years. I was in Shoshone Idaho, and the guy who was working with us kept asking me questions about being a Canadian and did I have a visa, and when was I planning on going back to Canada.
I packed my car, went to my Canadian friend, and asked her to leave with me right now as something bad was about to happen. She refused to leave. I drove straight to the US/Canada border without stopping. When I got to the border I was grilled about where I had been, how long I had been in the US, where did I live, etc.
I was never so happy to be on the Canadian side of the border. I found out later that within an hour of my leaving custom officers showed up and arrested all of the Canadians that had been working at the carnival. They got charged for working without visas, fined, and banned from entering the United States for quite a number of years.
That stopped my gypsy international travels. So I started traveling around my province, Alberta. I have moved so many times I have lost count. I traveled light took what I could carry and then sold what I did not need when I moved once again.
During all of these adventures starting at the age of 16, I found myself married and divorced 4 times. I gave birth to three daughters, two of whom are in my life, and one I gave up for adoption. I was a gypsy at heart and did not know how to settle down and create a stable environment for myself nor my daughters.
When I hit thirty-four, I had two angry teenage daughters. We were living in a run-down townhouse and I had just dumped another loser of a boyfriend and I knew in my heart that I had to change my life.
I did my best to stay at a job longer than a year. I met my fourth husband when I was selling computer equipment at a local store. I actually had two guys wanting to date me but I choose him because he took care of himself and was always dressed really nice. The other guy always showed up in sweats and tee shirts and was a dungeon and dragons player. I could see a future with my ex but just felt like I would be cleaning up after the other guy all the time.
Eventually, I began to think of my ex as my soulmate. I fantasized about us growing old together. Creating a life that was filled with unconditional love, respect, kindness, and my daughters would love him too. The reality was that my daughters did not like him and I saw very little of them over the next 10 years, as my youngest chose to move in with her dad and his new wife, my eldest daughter was in grade 12 and moved in with a friend to finish her high school. (Interesting story but too long to go into here).
I had at least 4 different jobs during the first two years we lived together. We eventually married and I continued to move from job to job. I was trying to find my niche in life. However every time I found success in my career my relationship with my husband would become strained. I felt like I had to choose him and our marriage over my career. So once again I began to work from home.
I set up a healing practice as a Reiki healer and teaching reiki courses while continuing to take other courses that would complement my healing business. Eventually, my ex decided to leave the air force and move us to a small town to be with his family. We bought a small trailer to live in and placed it on his sister's property.
I established a house cleaning and yard care business while also taking an online course so I could go back to school and earn a decent living for a change. However one day my husband woke up and decided he no longer loved me, he did not like me and he was leaving me. He packed up my car and I found myself driving towards my next adventure
I was devastated, I felt like a failure, how did I not see this coming? I lost complete faith in myself on that six-hour road trip. I cried! I thought about just driving and not stopping until I ran out of money, fuel, or road. I was humiliated to the core of my being and my heart felt like it had been shattered into a million pieces.
At the age of 49, I ended up back in the city I grew up in feeling defeated unloved and weary to the bone. My daughters were married and mothers. They each had a daughter, and one had just given birth to her second child, a boy.
I now had the opportunity to try to repair the broken relationship with my daughters, and become a grandmother to the grandchildren I barely knew.
Needless to say, my life did not get any easier. I worked 7 days a week to pay the bills, spent time with my daughters and grandchildren putting up with being treated like a stain on their carpet for a lot of years.
Healing family wounds takes a long time. It takes perseverance. It takes diving deep into the shadow self. Releasing negative karma, while recognizing and changing negative patterns that have been around for generations. And saying "I am sorry" so many times you feel like a broken record.
"Daughters, are not very forgiving of mothers who they feel abandoned them. I too had never forgiven my mother for how she treated me as a child. The truly magical part of this journey is; as I healed my relationship with my daughters, my relationship with my mother healed. It was a slow process, it hurt like hell, and I cried a lot during those years of personal growth but in the end, it was worth every tear."
Is my relationship 100% healed with my daughters. No, but we are better. We spend quality time when we can. I get to spend time with my grandchildren, not as much as I would like but it is enough for now. My relationship with my mom is one of friendship and mutual respect now. I hold no grudge nor judgment of either parent anymore.
I have come to the realization, during my life so far, that we are all on a personal journey to discover who we are at the Soul level. We are here to heal from past lives and find a way to accept and forgive not only ourselves but all those who we have interacted with in this lifetime as well as in our past lives together.
I realize that true happiness and joy reside within me. No one can make me happy, no one can create joy in my life. I hold no expectations of those around me because they too are on a personal journey. I am 100% responsible when it comes to creating joy, happiness, and a life filled with adventure and personal wins.
It is a magical journey I am on.
What I do do is hold the sacred space that allows us to interact with each other. Creating a sanctuary to share our stories.
It is such a gift to be able to meet new people through online media. There are no borders, there is no time zone that can not be reached, there is no cultural difference that can not be shared and enjoyed. We have the opportunity to find new friends, new business partners, new clients, and share our joy, knowledge, and wisdom with others.
I am truly grateful we have found each other and so looking forward to meeting all the new friends the universe is sending my way. So here's to vulnerability and the sharing of one's past🍸, present 🍹, and future.🍺
Sending you all Love and a three-minute hug,
Robynn Sheridan - Spirit Whisperer of higher consciousness helping people connect to their heart, mind, body, and Soul.